The magic of forgiveness

Forgiveness – Is it really that tough and what it does to you and your body?

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3 years back, a fateful event changed my life. I was angry at myself, on the situation and everyone around. Reason – I was blaming the world for that event. Not vocally but in my heart. My heart was filled with anguish and frustration all the time and that turned me into a rational person. Completely in contrast to what I was.

For a year, I kept cursing and cribbing. I became silent. Got me so much engrossed in work and kids so that there was no time to engage with anyone else. I didn’t leave any scope for anyone in my life. But then, it was affecting me inside out. Moments of loneliness were haunting. And I was not at peace. It was then my husband stepped into my father’ shoes to counsel me. But it was not easy for him also to convince me and make me realize what damage I was doing to myself and my family too.

To add to all this, another incident happened when someone whom I trusted blindly ditched me and all my faith in people and friendship had flown away with the wind. I stopped believing in people. Gradually, it took a toll on my health and I went into depression.

Despite having a beautiful family, lovely kids, a doting husband and supportive family back in India, I was into a bad state of mind. It killed all my creativity and left me like a restless soul.

It was getting too much for me to handle the stress. I realized it was only me who was suffering. I was living in the past only and was not able to enjoy the present. It was then, I introspected. I kept all my reservations aside and gave a serious thought on where I was heading.

It has been a few months now, I am happy in my own little world and the reason is I learned to forgive. I didn’t forget though and I don’t want to as teaches me not to trust someone blindly and reminds me of the mistakes I had made. I have my lessons learned for life.

A big credit goes to my kids also for this change in me. Motherhood teaches you so many things while you try to raise mentally strong kids. When I teach them to say sorry and forgive others, they learn it quickly. When they are upset with me, merely a warm hug melts them, they forgive me and move on. Then why can’t I?

But was that really easy to forgive? For me, No. Honestly, it wasn’t easy at all to let go of the things and forgive all those who hurt me. But I thought of giving it a try. For myself and my family because living with hard feelings was even tougher. It was killing me every moment.

During this transition, I realized that forgiveness transforms you. It makes you a positive person as you get rid of all the negativity and pessimism. I learned to count my blessings and delete those people and emotions from my life instead of holding back the grudges. My chapter with them is over. I forgave them by all my heart and moved on. No looking back, no flashbacks, and no regrets anymore.

As Mahatma Gandhi said, “The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong”. I follow this principle in my life now and I wish to pass on this lesson to my daughters also that forgiveness is a virtue of the strongest.

“Life is too short to live with grudges, forgive and move on”.

‘I’m Writing Bravely for the Write Tribe Festival of Words – March 2019’

Prompt: One word: Forgive

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Alpana Deo
March 5, 2019 2:24 pm

Strong read Vartika. Yeah, not everyone can forgive. It is truly an act of greatness. It’s not about compromising but to grow mature in handling situations and as you said to accept “that chapter is over”. We cannot carry the burden of what went wrong with us is all the time.
#writebravely #celebratewritetribe

March 5, 2019 3:30 pm

Could relate to it completely Vartika. Nicely penned downed your struggle

Amarjeet Sonia Madaan
March 5, 2019 4:02 pm

Nice post. It’s tough to forgive and let go things of but we have to for at least our own peace of mind.

Anurag Singh
March 5, 2019 7:09 pm

That is something inspirational too

nicely written and well drafted

Aslam Khan
March 5, 2019 7:32 pm

So well Written Vartika, It really needs the courage to forgive. I too had the same story years back and I really understand how much pain you feel to forgive someone.
Nicely Scripted

Corinne Rodrigues
March 6, 2019 7:37 am

Thank you for sharing this, Vartika. Life teaches us lessons and it’s important we learn them. Finally, it’s love that saves us from ourselves.

Ipsa Gupta
March 12, 2019 1:26 pm

A well read; indeed!! Loved the way you expressed this. A must read for everyone.

Preety tiwari
March 13, 2019 4:58 am

This is an amazing read!!
Forgive someone is not so easy, it needs so much courage but as u said life is too short we must not waste it in fighting and cursing. Live happily and spread cheer

jaideep khanduja
March 13, 2019 6:38 am

Recently i read a beautiful quotation. Though I don’t remember it exactly, its crux was – live every moment in the present to its fullest without thinking too much about the past and bothering too much about the future.

March 13, 2019 6:59 am

Truly it’s not easy to forgive, but to move on and to have a peaceful life we have to forgive some people, but the thing is we can’t forget what wrong they have done with us. More power to you 🙂

March 13, 2019 7:58 am

Oh yes it is indeed true’ such beautifully written post! One should really forgive & enjoy the present moment ❣️

March 13, 2019 10:52 am

You put out ur emotions so perfectly. I could feel you and also glad that you fight back and now happy.

Pooja Budhiraja
March 13, 2019 11:06 am

Yes ofcourse all days are not same. One must learn to forgive and forget sometimes.

March 13, 2019 5:57 pm

to be honest, forgiveness is tough but your post made it easy and necessary. can complete relate to it

March 14, 2019 5:28 am

At some point of time in our life, we have to let things go for our own peace. I am also learning ut gradually. It seriously gives peace.

March 14, 2019 9:22 pm

Thats a perfect read dear.. i genuinely feel forgiveness is tough, coz when someone matters to you and they hurt you get in a dual situation to forgive or not. Its indeed an chaos for mind and body. And even if u forgive, something is not same as before

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